i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
