im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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