He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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