Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Randomize