So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
