Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
