first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize