I skipped work to stalk him.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
