Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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