Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
