When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
