Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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