im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
