remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
