this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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