i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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