Non-Jews are for practice
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Randomize