Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
