We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize