Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
is wine microwaveable?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize