ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
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