Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
