it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Randomize
