...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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