I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
