I'm so fucking centered right now
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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