I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
i need some magic done to my vagina
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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