Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize