Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
