Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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