Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Randomize
