it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
