it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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