is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
