Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
