were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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