so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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