brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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