If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
