ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
