Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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