I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize