Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
