Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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