Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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