Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
