maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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