pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
