let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
