Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
