I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
